Irish Anti-Gay Commerical
The following is the transcript of a video created for the Iona Institute.
When a man and woman fall in love, they can get married, right? So why can’t two men, or two women who love each other get married as well? Isn’t it discrimination to stop them? Except it’s not discrimination, to treat different situations in different ways. Everyone in caring, dependant relationships, deserves legal protection. But the relationship of a man and a woman is unique. Only a man and a woman can make new life. Only a man and a woman can give a child a mum and a dad. No two men, and no two women, can ever do this. So it makes sense to treat something unique, in a unique way. That’s not discrimination. Marriage is a private promise between two people, but it has a big public purpose as well. That purpose is unique and important, to give children the love of their mum and dad in one family. Of course, not all married couples have children, but every child ever born has a mum and a dad. Marriage between a man and a woman recognises this basic fact and that’s why marriage is our most important social institution. It’s our way of saying that the differences between men and women matter, that the differences between mothers and fathers matter, and that kids have a right to what they long for, a loving mum and dad. So let’s not change the message of marriage by redefining it, for the sake of our children.
And this is the pastel coloured, well-animated version, with happy families ambient background music, and oh-so sensible young-adult male and female voiceovers.
I’m going to have a look at some of the contents to see if I can make any sense out of them, after all there may be some wisdom amongst all the shite.
“it’s not discrimination, to treat different situations in different ways”
Seriously? Merriam-Webster disagrees:
to make a difference in treatment or favor on a basis other than individual merit
Ah well, maybe they had a late night when scripting it, so I’ll forgive them that error (after all forgiveness is an important cornerstone of christianity).
Everyone in caring, dependant relationships, deserves legal protection.
You see, they don’t hate gays, after all if two men or two women are in a caring dependant relationship, it’s wrong to discriminate against them by not offering legal protection.
But the relationship of a man and a woman is unique.
Ah lads, don’t hijack what a relationship is now will you. Oh wait, you mean a sexual relationship, is it? The absence of the word sex in the script is unsurprising. After all, this isn’t about sex, it’s about the children. I mean what kind of a relationship can you have without children on the scene. But it’s okay childless married people, this video won’t discriminate against you either, you’ll get a mention later on.
Only a man and a woman can give a child a mum and a dad.
They must have been wrecked when they were scripting this. It seems they forgot to include the word biological as well. Plenty of men and women are mums and dads to children whom they have no biological link with. This is bloody obvious, isn’t it? Does the Iona Institute really believe that a biological connection is stronger than a bond forged through years of care, and love?
No two men, and no two women, can ever do this.
A sex-education lesson in forty-seven characters.
So it makes sense to treat something unique, in a unique way.
That’s not discrimination.
Sigh. Okay, let’s say my unicorn, Starlight, tells me that this really is something unique (I always believe my unicorn), that still isn’t enough to convince me that it’s not discrimination. I’m waiting for someone to hit me with a frying pan engraved with Godwin’s Law.
Marriage is a private promise between two people, but it has a big public purpose as well. That purpose is unique and important, to give children the love of their mum and dad in one family.
Let me tell you all a little story of how myself and my then girlfriend decided to get married. You see, we’d been dating for a number of years. I was (and still am) a man, she was (and still is) a woman. It was almost as if we were born for some public purpose. We tried to figure out what the reason was.
Endless cups of tea, pints of beer, and expensive spirit and mixer combinations were used to try to expand our minds so that we could hopefully find what that special purpose was. (A more economically sound approach would have been to contact the Iona Institute.)
Then one day it struck us, it was our public duty to make babies! We were so lucky that we didn’t have our children before we got married. I shudder to think of how everything might have turned out differently if we did. To know, that we’d let down “the public”, that we’d missed our true purpose, that we’d… WILL YOU SHUT UP!
It’s our way of saying that the differences between men and women matter
cough discrimination cough
So let’s not change the message of marriage by redefining it, for the sake of our children.
But it’s okay to change the message of discrimination by redefining it?
If men are allowed to marry men, and women are allowed to marry women (see how cool us mums and dads are for allowing this) something is going to happen my children? Can I buy some kind of alarm to alert me when this danger is imminent?
It interests me that the script always puts men before women, but mums before dads. Maybe I’m just reading too much into that, the fact that I’m not washing the kitchen floor before bed allows me such a luxury.
The title of the video on YouTube is interesting too. It’s a more honest title than the video would suggest.